First of all, we should be aware that when we go to seek help from others, we must embrace the psychology of being rejected or accepted. Being rejected, we will not be particularly sad or angry. Similarly, it is the same psychology that others come to us for help.
We ask others for help, but they don't have time or a lot of things to do, so we will not bother each other in a sensible way; similarly, when others ask us for help, we can tell each other frankly that we are not free and we are very busy.
If we don't have time and promise each other's things, then because of our limited energy, it's possible that things on both sides haven't been done well, and the gains and losses are outweighed.
If we are not willing to help ourselves, in the course of reluctant help, what the other party actually feels is likely to be helpful, but the other party is not grateful, instead, resents your new life.
Many times, when we help once, there will be a second, third and fourth time. We don't always have time and effort to help. When we help for the first time and don't help later, others will blame ourselves for not helping. Human nature is like this.
A lot of things are actually very simple, and we can do it easily, but the other side can do it through efforts, and we don't have to help.