Are you also in the stage of making trouble with your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law before marriage? At this time, many people begin to wonder if they want to get married? Is it suitable for two people? Because marriage is not between two people, but between two families. Let's take a look at it
Many pre marital conflicts, in fact, from the moment of seeing their parents, have planted seeds of conflicts, giving each other's parents a first impression, often far-reaching impact. So let's talk about what we should pay attention to when we meet our parents, or think about the situation when we meet our parents.
Respect: with a heart of respect and filial piety, it's the future elders, not the enemies of the future family
Gifts: know each other's parents' preferences, physical condition and buy appropriate gifts
(personal comparison recommends buying fruits, health products and nutrition products. Tobacco and alcohol injury, depending on the situation)
Dress and appearance: clean and tidy, not fancy, not heavy makeup
be neither humble nor pushy:
You can lower the bottom line for your happiness, but there must be a bottom line.
Sweet mouth, but not too much.
Let parents in law feel that you are a reliable and trustworthy son-in-law.
Let parents in law feel that you are a part of a family that can get along with. 2. Get along before marriage
Relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law before marriage:
Now young people want to live in a two person world. Even after marriage, in most families, when your child is born, do you prefer to have a baby sitter or parents?
Deal with the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law well before marriage. This kind of dog blood plot between a man's mother and his wife is not only in TV and movies, but also in reality many men are dealing with and adjusting things.
When my mother is doing good for you and my wife is doing good for you, but my mother and my wife are in conflict, it's time to explain patiently and sort out the communication. Family relationship before marriage:
After meeting your parents, you must have the etiquette for your mother's family during the Spring Festival. You must be able to arrive in person for the Spring Festival, the Dragon Boat Festival, the Mid Autumn Festival, and the birthday. If you can't arrive in person, you must arrive with gifts and red envelopes and telephone greetings.
The married daughter, instead of splashing out water, makes the parents in law have this feeling of having more than one family member, which has a very positive effect on formal marriage in the future.
Although Chinese officials have said that they have entered a well-off society. However, with the rapid rise of house prices, there are still many couples to be married, because of the marriage pressure brought by cars and houses.
If there are conditions, the pressure in this respect is still less, that is, the car is good, the car is broken, the house is big and the house is small
If the conditions are general, it is suggested to give priority to the house. In many women's hearts, the house = their own nest, which is an important factor in the sense of marriage security
If the conditions are very poor, if your true love is greater than the pressure of parents and public opinion, greater than the fear of the future, and the man has a positive attitude, the future can change the status quo, bring women happiness, go to register. Marriage really needs a certain material basis, although it doesn't have to be a house or a car. If the conditions are not good, wait until the conditions are better.
Don't say to the woman, "I don't have money, I don't have a house, you don't marry me." that's bullshit. On the other hand, if you are a woman, even if you really like you, what's the feeling of hearing this sentence. 4. Dowry and gift money
In 2008, in my hometown, 50000 yuan was able to do the gift and wedding together.
Today in 2015, if you don't have 100000 yuan, don't think of marrying your daughter-in-law.
The proportion of gift money accounts for a large part,
Because the woman's gift was too high, she was pregnant with children, but also scattered
Because the gift money is too high, those who want to return the gift money near marriage and repentance have
All kinds of things should depend on the economic situation of the families of both sides. The couple to be should communicate with their parents (first of all, of course, the couple should be united)
1. There are many gifts and money. Women have face (this custom is found in many places)
2. If you give a lot of money, the woman will buy it as a dowry and send it to her husband
3. Most parents in law, in fact, don't take up the gift money for their own use. They will give it to their daughter in another way
(of course, there are many examples around I, just like selling daughters, which is estimated to be a few. If it happens, give yourself the bottom line. It's so much at most. It's too much. This needs to be discussed with your daughter-in-law. If it's not, it's that your feelings are not strong enough.)
In terms of betrothal gifts, like our hometown, we will also send "Li Niang meat" and go according to local customs.
Parents of both sides communicate well. Kneel down and thank you. This situation is rare. It's a treasure of life to meet such parents.
Most of the time, both parents, because of the relationship of region and character, will have such and such maladjustment at the beginning. There must be some dissatisfaction in the middle,
Some of them will say it clearly and quarrel with each other as soon as they say it
Some of them will be secretly dissatisfied. It's accumulated a lot and it's terrible to burst out
Many parents will tell their children that the two sides of their children pass on the meaning of each other's parents and then to their parents. In the middle, we must pay attention to the fact that those who are good at the marriage process can be appropriately whitewashed and exaggerated, and those who are bad at the process must be reduced as much as possible.
Parents do not support, the problem is very serious! Do a good job in communication, and family relations! 6. Wedding arrangements and greeting
The location, specification and details of the wedding banquet shall be negotiated by both husband and wife, and serve as the communication link between the parents of both parties, so that the parents of both parties can understand the details of the wedding banquet.
If there is any contradiction, try to negotiate. Generally, it's not a big contradiction or dissatisfaction when it comes to the arrangement of the wedding banquet. Marriage is a certainty.
As the protagonist of marriage, both husband and wife must resist. If the conflict between the two of us is caused by the conflicts between our relatives and the outside world, it is the time to test your feelings. (some blind dates don't have much feelings, that's the time to test your fate)
I'd like to mention in particular the arrangement of the wedding car. Not much luxury, but the parking space must be enough. In my hometown, if the man has a certain distance from the woman, he will send an empty car to pick up the relatives of the woman to see them off. The number of people who see them off will be roughly counted by the woman, but most of them have increased temporarily, so he would rather spend more money on a car than cause the embarrassment that some of the women's relatives want to go but have no place. (it's easy to leave a message for the woman in her relatives and friends circle) 7. Welcome to the red envelope
Man: most of the places have this custom. Be sure to prepare it. The red envelope is not too big. Make a picture for a celebration. Be sure to prepare it. The bridegroom has to pick up the bride. There are a lot of checkpoints and red envelopes.
Woman: the request for red envelopes is necessary, but it should not be too much. If you play too much, it will be counterproductive. Because the woman asked too much, the news that the man turned around and repented at that time may be true. 8. There are many trivial matters in marriage, and there are contradictions in trivial matters, which can be solved by resolving, and the heart can become happiness!
I hope that the wedding will be smooth and happy!