More and more young people are used to ballooning social intercourse. They get to know each other quickly and are indifferent quickly. They don't have to be too distracted when communicating with each other. They usually choose to avoid it and reduce the chance of communicating with others. This is the most direct way for modern people to communicate, so do you understand the balloon social interaction?
'balloon' socializing: our relationship is easy to expand and shrink, and it will burst as soon as we poke it
Liu Bin, a post-95 girl, just took part in a werewolf fight among alumni last weekend. She fell in love with a strange girl beside her. During the break of the game, she chatted about her interests, learning and feelings. Before she left, she reluctantly added wechat to each other. But when we got back to the dormitory, the name of the wechat that we called each other 'baby' not long ago was never opened, and the two were like parallel lines without intersection.
After 00, Xu Jialing joined a fan group because of her pursuit of stars. Everyone chatted about love beans in the group and shared their daily life as sisters. But after a busy week, the wechat group was silent in thousands of lines of lists, with only occasional English punch in and takeout sharing.
This relationship is quite like a balloon. It's easy to blow up, and it's also easy to be discouraged. Once you poke it, it will burst. It's beautiful, but it can't last long. But Liu Bin and Xu Jialing don't think much of it. For them, such things are very popular. They are no different from eating and sleeping every day. It seems that the broken relationship is not a pity at all.
This kind of situation is quite common in today's young people's social life. The social relationship of modern people is very simple. You and I met at an activity. They went there alone. It's a bit embarrassing that they didn't have a partner. They quickly added friends to the activity to chat and speculate. Soon after they met, they would have a 'baby' and 'dear', and they would have no contact after they said goodbye. More and more young people are more and more used to 'balloon' social interaction. They get to know each other quickly and become indifferent quickly. They don't have to be too distracted when communicating with each other. They don't need to pay attention to maintaining the relationship. It doesn't matter if they break up accidentally. After all, if they are too serious, you will lose.
Jiang Hao, who has just been working for half a year, works for an Internet company in Beijing. As a business analyst, he analyzes data in a lot of reports every day and contributes 50 hours a week to the company. He has no friends and often joins various parties invited by colleagues on weekends.
'I take part in all kinds of dinners, playing ball games and singing karaoke, hoping to make new friends. At first I was very happy and felt that everyone around me was very enthusiastic about you, but at last I found that this kind of enthusiasm was not the real one you imagined. 'Jiang Hao has some helplessness.' you think that chatting with you at the party is to make friends with you. In fact, it's just because the strange you have aroused their curiosity for the time being and can only give them limited information. At the end of the party, the relationship came to an abrupt end. '
With the acceleration of the pace of life, running a close relationship means higher and higher economic and time costs. Self marketing in the circle of wechat friends, fast-food feelings in the dating app, and unwavering revelry in strangers' gatherings & hellip; & hellip; the intensive society connects everyone's life more closely, bringing a lot of interpersonal resources as well as a more casual concept of intimacy.
Modern life style means the compression of social relations. Tai & middot; Tian Dai, a New York psychologist and author of embarrassment, believes: "the advantage of social communication is that it can remind us of our need for a sense of belonging and let us know that we need to be a member of the group and get the support of the group. 'and' balloon 'socializing doesn't seem to be a long-term way.
Li Gang, who is now a graduate student, once had a short-term internship in a bank. At first, he got along well with the bank lobby manager, who is not a few years older than him. The manager told him about his work experience, and he shared the interesting things about the university with the manager. However, as soon as the internship ended, the manager became a name that had never been listed on wechat.
Maybe I, who study economics, only focus on the effectiveness of the individual, so I think this kind of communication in work is caused by individual interests. A good relationship with a new colleague at work is conducive to workplace cooperation. Once you get out of this network of interests, such as the end of your internship or the resignation of a colleague, you don't want to maintain this relationship, because it's meaningless. '
Huang Silin, a professor at the school of psychology of Beijing Normal University, believes that the current phenomenon among young people, especially college students, is related to the purpose of young people's communication and the need to maintain this relationship, which determines the duration and necessity of the relationship. Sometimes, although wechat contact is established, there is no need to communicate with each other, so there is no need to maintain the relationship. But it has little effect on young people's social willingness. If they have to build a relationship, they will still develop it.
The song "once upon a time was slow" adapted from the lyrics of writer Mu Xin wrote: "in the past, the sun became slow, cars, horses and mail were slow. "People are willing to spend weeks waiting for a letter across the mountains and rivers, just to share their life and heart with friends from afar. Nowadays, social contact is more convenient, but it is difficult to have slow and in-depth exchanges. Superficial communication has completely changed the communication content of modern people.
Some netizens commented on their social status: 'we seldom discuss topics other than our own life, and we are no longer used to the heavy atmosphere of ideological exchanges. It's so hard to find a like-minded person to talk to that once you find that the person you like has no possibility of spiritual communication with you, you will quickly turn to the next goal. '
Happiness researchers have found that the most happy people have in common is that they always maintain positive, long-term and supportive social interaction. Perhaps, instead of having a 'balloon' type of fast social relationship, it's better to slow down the expansion of the relationship and have a long and good connection than to have a 'poke and break'.