Wandering in the workplace is inseparable from being in the world. You are knowledgeable in speaking and doing things. If you want to be like a fish in the water in the workplace, you have to master the rules of the workplace. Today, share 52 hidden rules for novices in the workplace, so that you can become a real expert in the workplace.
Knowledge about chatting
01. There are two kinds of people who can chat: one is to make others say it well, and the other is to make others listen to it well.
02. People who can't chat never talk about topics, occasions or objects, so what they say always feels like finding fault.
03. Some people, the less they can say, the more they like to rush to say. They clearly have nothing in their stomach and can't hold two or two sesame oils. They always fantasize that others are full of favor for them.
04. There is also a kind of people in life who always show off that they know this senior official and that famous person in conversation. They often take out a series of lists to bask in the sun, making others feel that he is awesome and can't open their eyes. In English, this kind of person is called 'name dropper'.
05. People who like to boast about themselves are like puffer fish. Whenever they encounter danger, they will rise into a round ball. Because they have no attack power, they can only win attention by bluffing. For example, when did you see a shark rise into a ball?
06. Smart people know that most of the gossip between acquaintances is not to exchange opinions or broaden ideas. They just want to express themselves and seek recognition.
07. Many times, saying or not is a large-scale face project.
08. A person will often speak in order to save face, talk nonsense without thinking, and even spread lies that can't justify themselves. His purpose was not malicious, and there was only one subtext, that is, 'don't look down on me, I'm very cow'.
09. If you don't speak at this time, it doesn't mean you don't understand, but you don't need to expose other people's lies. To save face for others is an expression of understanding.
10. Chinese people value face more than interests. A talkative person can save face for his friends skillfully without making himself appear hypocritical; Neither by belittling others to highlight themselves, nor by belittling themselves to elevate others.
About obedience and questioning
11. Speaking is an art. It shows not only the frame, but also a person's upbringing.
12. The best education doesn't require you to amaze everyone as soon as you open your mouth, but to understand transposition and always think from the perspective of others.
13. The most difficult part of transposition thinking is that you have to change yourself to an uncomfortable position to think.
14. Think from the perspective of the other party. First understand the reason and purpose of speaking. For example, a woman says she has gained weight again recently, and you kindly recommend a weight-loss drug to her. In the end, you can only treat her with white eyes.
15. When talking with strangers, many people often don't know where to start. What is worse than this is that some people have nothing to say and have to find something to say. As a result, they are full of nonsense and are naturally unpopular.
16. People who can chat are often good at listening. However, listening is not a passive reception, it is a process of feedback.
17. Listening is a concrete expression of concern for others. When others speak, please put down your cell phone, make more eye contact, keep leaning forward, give them the least courtesy and respect, and more importantly, don't interrupt them.
18. When listening, ask some questions appropriately so that the other party is willing to communicate more.
19. There are two ways to ask questions: closed questions and open questions.
20. Closed questions refer to those questions that can only be answered by 'yes' or' no '. For example, "did you eat today?", The other party can only answer 'ate' or 'didn't eat', and can't continue the conversation.
21. On the contrary, the answers to open-ended questions are not limited. For example, "I seem to be fat again recently. How can I keep my body as good as you?", Similar questions require the other party to further describe the relevant things, and it will be easier for you to get valuable information.
22. Communication is a "two-way street". Everyone needs appropriate self-expression. Therefore, open questions are easier for each other to open their hearts, so as to build mutual trust.
About workplace communication
23. Speaking is a 'deadly' ability in the workplace. Employees who can't express themselves are not first-class employees; A manager who can't express can't be a manager at all.
24. Ineffective communication at work is the most common, such as giving someone a good opinion, or telling the boss the truth in good faith, but getting the other party's look of disapproval.
25. What you say is far more important than how you say it, because the listener's feeling is always more important than what you express.
26. The highest level of communication is to speak to the other party's heart. For example, the following three principles: avoid saying what others don't like to hear, find what the other party is happy to hear, and refine what is useful to both sides.
27. Speaking straight is really not a good thing, because communication is not a fight. There is no need to always try to convince the other party.
28. The most effective communication is never to win or lose, but to let the other party support what you want to do through communication.
29. When speaking in front of many people, it's best to speak ahead, because people's attention is limited. The more they go to the back, the less energy they have to listen to what you say.
30. When reporting work, you should first say the conclusion, not the problems you found or the demonstration process. Because the longer you pave the way, the more likely others are to feel upset, and the effective information can not be better transmitted.
31. No matter how much you need to say, please try to summarize it into three points. Because the human brain can only deal with three things effectively.
32. If you want to speak impressively, you have to make good use of data, stories and pictures. For example, to describe a person as attractive, it can be said: 'when he passes the station, nine out of ten people look back at him for more than five seconds'.
33. To improve the logic of your speech, you should always pay attention to three questions: what is it (what are you describing)? Why (why should they pay attention to it)? What to do (what to do when you know it)?
34. Never communicate when the other person is in mood, because you can't control other people's emotions. What you can do is to dredge the worries behind other people's emotions.
35. Don't make a closed-loop answer when you encounter a question you don't understand, and try to throw it back with a rhetorical question.
36. When communicating, most people like to choose what they are good at. For example, did you watch the ball yesterday? If the answer is' I don't watch the ball ', the topic is over. You can put it another way, 'I've been busy lately and haven't paid much attention. Was there a good game yesterday?'.
37. Mastering the ways and skills of asking questions can break 80% of the communication deadlock. After all, in the process of communication, the focus is not what you express, but what the other party thinks and does under your influence.
About the propriety of speaking
38. The so-called proper speech means that you should be responsible for everything you say.
39. Never try to evaluate other people's lives. Used to it, it's congenial; I don't like it. Just shut up.
40. Commenting on others is based on a certain friendship. It is the so-called 'why talk deep when feeling shallow'. People who do not know why are not qualified to evaluate others from above.
41. The most selfish word in the world is' I'm doing it for you '. Those who always say that they are good for you have a deep self-interest. In the final analysis, to be good for you is to be good for myself.
42. There is only one kind of good in this world, which is called 'just be happy'. People who can really chat will not trample on others' self-esteem as benefactors. They will give you advice, not advice.
43. Don't pry into other people's privacy at will. Privacy is not asked, but waiting. Asking others' privacy rashly is tantamount to violating others' sovereignty.
44. When talking with others, we should grasp the rhythm and avoid excessive self exposure when we lack mutual understanding. If you reveal yourself too early, you will not only make the other party feel stressed, but also likely to frustrate yourself in the follow-up.
45. The best way to make others think highly of you is to learn to praise others actively. For example, the ability to speak in the workplace is to make the superiors have light, the peers have face, and the subordinates have merit.
46. Praise should not be generalized, but describe other people's specific behaviors and details. For example, always boasting about a person's beauty will appear hypocritical. It's better to say, 'today's dress looks like your skin is good, and this dress must not be cheap'.
47. Don't be too humble when encountering others' praise, and say 'thank you' frankly. If someone praises you for your beautiful clothes, but in exchange for a sentence 'this is just a stall', it will embarrass the other party.
48. The highest level of praise is to say good words behind others. Compliments delivered through a third party are often 10 times more effective than face-to-face expression.
49. Praise is not flattery. No one in the world is a fool. Benign communication is based on sincerity and blindly following the trend. In the end, only humility comes.
50. It's no use mastering skills for people who can't speak. The so-called real trick to read thousands of books, travel thousands of miles and read countless people is to constantly cultivate your internal skills.
51. Speaking is a learning of choice: you have the right to say and not to say; You have the right to listen and not to listen.
52. In the final analysis, what you say often reveals who you are.