At present, most of the families have only one child. The children live a more and more independent life. Soon, parents will find that the things children like will not be touched by others, and they are not willing to share them with others. This is very urgent for parents. What should we do? Xiaobian will take you to solve the problem.
Due to the different temperament of each child, not every only child has a strong desire to monopolize, especially "unable to share". However, according to the field observation, kindergarten and primary school teachers believe that since the only child is all adults at home and serves one child, their needs will be met immediately. Therefore, there is a lack of prior experience in getting along with peers and the problem of narrow interpersonal skills.
Join the "long term" group of friends to learn and cooperate with others
For exclusive only children (or non only children with this trait), experts suggest joining "long-term" partner group activities, such as religious groups (churches), scouts, wilderness associations, teams or bands, to help children create a virtual hand foot interaction situation, so that they have the opportunity to wait in the group, take turns, think about others, cooperate with others, and even practice facing them Conflict. Avoid spending most of the holiday time at home or in one-man talent classes (such as piano lessons).
Delay the children's satisfaction, let the children get used to considering the needs of others. Parents of only children can treat themselves as children's brothers and play the game of "cooperation and sharing" with them. "Come on, my whole family will mop the floor. You are in charge of your own room. When eating fruit after dinner, he deliberately divided the fruit into small pieces and put it into each family's plate. His mouth said, "one piece for you, one piece for father, one piece for mother." put the software "share" into the children's head since childhood. We should also remember to create frustration and waiting experience for the only child, so that they can not get used to the wrong mode of being satisfied as soon as they have requirements.
Parents should also pay attention to whether "sharing" becomes a tool for children to please others or exchange benefits. For children who are particularly generous and like to give gifts to their friends, experts think that they may lack other skills in making friends. They can guide children to discuss and think about what they will do for their friends and enrich their social skills. Parents should also pay special attention to avoid children often have the opportunity to receive valuable gifts, so as to avoid confusion of children's values, and it is easy to cause disputes when children are sent to schools or groups.
Pay attention to whether the child is just afraid of being scolded
Finally, there is a kind of children who "when adults ask for it, they share it without saying anything". Experts warn that these children may be in the situation of self satisfaction, they rush to deal with the instructions of adults, and even give their own share out, just to please adults or avoid scolding, resulting in too depressed personality. If there are such children in the family, experts suggest observing first, whether the children share the toys out of their own initiative, or if they only play half of the time but see the adults beside them, they will immediately share them. If so, ask the children "do you want to play again?" next time, confirm their willingness, and tell them that their own exclusive things can not be shared and can be discussed with adults if they are not willing to share.