A sharing from Haimei: when campus violence is frequent, children dare not say it, and parents are not around. How to deal with it? Is it a tit for tat?
How to judge whether a child is suffering from campus violence?
1. Body scar
There are bruises and scratches on the surface of the child's body for no reason, which may be violence. If children often wear long sleeves in hot weather, they may want to cover up.
2. Loss or loss of personal belongings
If children's shoes, jewelry, stationery and other personal items are often lost or damaged, parents should pay attention to it.
3. Toilet habits change
Children have to go home to go to the bathroom? The school toilet is likely to have become a place of violence.
4. Self esteem frustrated
When children return home, they often feel sad and depressed. They are likely to be hurt by slander and other mental aspects in school.
5. Self harm tendency
Parents should attach great importance to children's self injury and even suicide in any form.
6. Unwilling to go to school
Children don't want to go to school very much, even play truant, pretend to be sick and ask for leave. They may be ostracized and bullied at school.
Sleep problems, insomnia, nightmares, bed wetting and other problems may also appear when children encounter violence.
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Tell your child what to do with school violence
1. If you encounter campus violence, you must keep calm and don't panic. Take circuitous tactics, delay time as much as possible, and protect yourself bravely and resourcefully. Try to have a chance to ask for help.
2. When necessary, call for help from passers-by and use abnormal actions to attract the attention of the people around.
3. Personal safety always comes first. Don't irritate the other party.
4. When there is a great disparity in the strength between yourself and the other party, we should realize that we have the ability to protect ourselves and extricate ourselves from the predicament through rational and strategic conversation or with the help of environment.
5. When you are not far away from each other's strength, you can consider using warning language to repel the other party's attempt. However, we should avoid using threatening words, so as not to arouse the antagonistic psychology of the interceptor.
6. Tell children that if they encounter campus violence, they must communicate with their parents and teachers in time, and do not suffer physical and psychological trauma in silence.
7. If children encounter campus violence, they are afraid of going to school, afraid of going out and anxious to make friends. They need to communicate with professionals in time and help them psychologically.
8. After children suffer violence, they should stabilize their emotions, understand and sympathize with them. At the same time, parents should spare time to accompany their children and give them enough sense of security.
9. Know that children encounter campus violence, the first time to communicate with the school, understand the real situation of children in school, and take up the legal weapons to protect children.
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What should parents do to prevent and deal with campus violence?
1. Attach importance to communication and contact with teachers and schools
Many parents ignore the communication and communication with the teacher in charge of the class, and seldom observe the situation around the school, so they lack the understanding of the safety situation of their children during school. Parents can find opportunities to chat with their children's classmates to find out whether there is school violence.
2. Prevention is the most important.
Parents can usually combine some common campus violence to guide their children and carry out preventive education. In the prevention education, we must guide the children to learn to distinguish the right from the wrong, from the straight. We should not induce the children to act one sidedly or to use violence against violence to avoid being bullied. Of course, we should also teach children some self-protection methods, so that children usually have psychological preparation and can handle things calmly.
3. When children encounter campus violence, parents should first manage their emotions.
When children encounter campus violence, parents are prone to emotional and even irrational behavior. At this time, it is suggested that parents should calm down and reflect on whether they understand the safety situation of their children's school, whether they have taught their children how to protect themselves, whether they have guided their children to distinguish the serious consequences of campus violence, and so on. If they are rational parents, after some analysis, they will find the most appropriate solution according to the actual situation, such as communicating with the beating children, coordinating with the head teacher and the school, or through legal means.
4. Don't blindly blame hitting children and their parents.
If a child is injured by violence on campus, it is necessary to collect relevant human evidence and material evidence in time. Then, go to the children concerned to find out about the situation. Generally speaking, beating a child or his or her parents, in the face of evidence, dare not shirk responsibility, even if they resort to law. Don't patronize and blame the head teacher and the school to arouse the opposition of each other, which leads to their unwillingness to cooperate and assist in solving problems.
5. Establish a good parent-child relationship and avoid rough solutions in daily family education.
Children's violent injury to others is not a single phenomenon, but closely related to the parenting style of their parents. Remind some parents that if your children bully other students, they must seriously reflect on whether there is domestic violence in the family. If the guidance is not good, children may learn experience from being beaten, and in turn vent their negative emotions and hurt other innocent students.